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8 Hilarious Stand-Up Comedians Share the Funny Side of Getting High

What’s better than getting high and watching stand-up comedy? Getting high and watching stand-up about getting high.

Comedians are known for pushing social boundaries, so it’s no surprise that weed is a major topic of discussion in many stand-up routines. If you need any proof that many comedians are stoners just like us, here are eight stand-ups featuring some of their funniest marijuana moments.

Tom Segura — ‘Disgraceful’

Why watch high?

Since gaining exposure through his three-special deal with Netflix, Tom Segura has been very vocal about his weed use. In Segura’s third Netflix special, Disgraceful, he cracks some highly relatable jokes about buying weed from sketchy sources, disagreeing with his dad about weed, and how children in the future will never believe our stories about strict weed laws.

Funniest weed joke?

Segura tells the story of his 15-year-old self buying weed from a guy in a solo trailer. The weed dealer tells Segura to watch the trailer while he goes to retrieve the weed, but before he leaves instructs Segura to “blast” anyone who enters with a shotgun — with the exception of the dealer’s mom. Segura stressed out, recounting, “I go, ‘Can we get a description before we agree to terms? How about a height and weight on old mom?’”

Where to watch: Netflix

Nick Swardson — ‘Seriously, Who Farted?’

Why watch high?

Though he was upset that he didn’t have any weed-smoking scenes in “Grandma’s Boy ,” Nick Swardson talks about smoking on set (even though they were given fake weed), getting overly high, and going to the movies stoned in his special, Seriously, Who Farted?

Funniest weed joke?

There’s nothing worse than being violently too high. Where it’s horrifying. Like, you know that feeling when you get way too high and you have, like, that inner monologue where you’re like ‘Just breathe, man, just breathe. You’re gonna be fine. Everything’s gonna be okay, man. Nobody knows you’re too high. Just breathe. All right, smile at everybody. [He makes a terrifying grin.] OK, that was the worst thing you could have ever done. They just called the police.’ ”

Where to watch: Amazon

Dave Chappelle — ‘The Age of Spin’

Why watch high?

From “Half Baked” to “ Chappelle’s Show,” Dave Chappelle has never been shy about his love for the plant. “The Age of Spin” is Chappelle’s first stand-up special following his departure from “Chappelle’s Show” and subsequent 10-year hiatus from comedy. It’s part of a two-episode comedy special which features bits about Chappelle’s pot foibles, his interactions with different social groups, and his career in Hollywood.

Funniest weed joke?

Chappelle responded to the TMZ headline “Dave Chappelle Drunk Onstage in Detroit” by saying he was actually just really high. He said, “I don’t know if you know anything about hanging out with rappers, but their weed is very strong [. ] The article goes on to say I was booed offstage, which is also incorrect. I was booed. I did not leave. It was a long bomb. It was a fucking nightmare.’”

Where to watch: Netflix

Joe Rogan — ‘Triggered’

Why watch high?

To say that cannabis activist Joe Rogan discusses his love for weed in his comedy and podcasts would be a major understatement. In his first Netflix special, “Triggered,” Rogan talks all things weed from getting high as a parent to getting ripped on edibles and talking to dolphins.

Funniest weed joke?

Rogan announces that he’s “high as fuck” and starts ranting about how the people making edibles need to slow down. He jokes, “I ask the dude at the pot store, I go ‘Hey man, how strong are the gummy bears?’ [. ] He’s like, ‘El Diablo. El Diablo.’ ‘Fuck man. How much should I take?’ ‘Just the leg.’ ‘Just the leg? Why are you selling whole bears? What the fuck are you trying to prove, man?’ ”

Where to watch: Netflix

Doug Benson — ‘Doug Dynasty’

Why watch high?

Doug Benson is one of the quintessential stoner stand-up comics. His jokes are irreverent and silly but, when you think about it, pretty darn clever. Basically, all of his material has something to do with getting high, so if you’re high and want to watch stand-up you can relate to, you really can’t miss this one.

Funniest Weed Joke?

Benson explained that he used to think meth and marijuana shouldn’t both be Schedule I drugs, but then he discovered that meth is actually Schedule IItwo on the Drug Enforcement Administration’s (DEA) Federal Controlled Substances Act. He said, “Like, marijuana is considered to be much worse than meth by the DEA. You know, the bottom line is I get high and watch “ Breaking Bad ,” I don’t watch “Weeds” on meth.”

Where to watch: Netflix

Katt Williams — ‘Pimp Chronicles Part 1’

Why watch high?

In addition to being a masterful comic, Katt Williams is an enthusiastic marijuana smoker. This special opens with Williams getting a pep talk from Snoop Dogg over a blunt , and covers everything from weed to the “pimps” running the U.S. government to the trials of being a black American. Oh yeah, and Lil Jon shows up and says some stuff near the end.

Funniest weed joke?

Williams tells the crowd that there’s a chemical in weed called “fuck it,” and, “If you can just get that in your system, it could change your life. Some of y’all be crying about bills you can’t pay. [. ] Just hit the blunt one time and see if it don’t change your perception of what’s important in life. You just, ‘I don’t know what I’ma do about this light. [He mimics a blunt hit.] Fuck them goddamn lights. I got 12 candles, I’ve been waiting to burn them bitches.’ ”

Where to watch: Netflix

Pete Davidson — ‘SMD’

Why watch high?

Whether on stage performing, in interviews, and behind Saturday Night Live ” ‘s Weekend Update desk, Pete Davidson has talked about his love for weed on so many different occasions that it’s hard to keep track. In “SMD,” Davidson talks about how weed makes everything better alongside a number of other topics like sending dick pics to his mom — who’s a school nurse, so it’s cool — and his personal thoughts on the movie “Jaws.”

Funniest weed joke?

Davidson announces that he loves driving high because he doesn’t mind traffic. He went on to say, “I love smoking weed and watching movies. It’s my favorite. You ever get so high you, like, watch the credits? And you’re like, ‘Who directed this? He did a good job.’ I think that’s what IMDB was created for people who just get high and they’re like, ‘Where is this guy from?’ And then you’re like, ‘Oh, there he is! He was in ‘ The Patriot !’ ”

Leslie Jones — ‘Problem Child’

Why watch high?

You might know Leslie Jones from Katt Williams’ It’s Pimpin’ Pimpin’ tour or from her bold personality on “SNL,” but you might not know how funny her first comedy video, “Problem Child,” really is. In her raunchy debut, Jones tells jokes about white people keeping wild animals as pets, advertising to crackheads, and ridiculous weed commercials.

Funniest weed joke?

Jones joked that anti-weed commercials just make her wanna smoke more weed. She said, “Y’all ever seen that commercial where the dog walks into the kitchen and start talking to the little girl? [. ] ‘I really really hate it when you get high ’cause you’re not the same person when you high.’ [. ] If I’m standing in my kitchen and my motherfucking dog start talking to me [. ] I’m gonna call my dealer and be like [. ] save me a half of that shit.”

Where to watch: Amazon

(Feature image: Frederick Tubiermont via Unsplash)

8 Hilarious Stand-Up Comedians Share the Funny Side of Getting High What’s better than getting high and watching stand-up comedy? Getting high and watching stand-up about getting high.

Taking The ‘High’ Road: The Best Stoned Celebrity Confessions Ever

From Sophie Turner to Jennifer Lawrence, these famous faces have shared their funniest 420 tales

Like many Americans, some celebrities enjoy the occasional — or not-so-occasional — herbal indulgence.

In honor of today’s green holiday, we’re looking back at the times stars have candidly shared their funniest tales of marijuana escapades. Their confessions are bound to give you a serious case of the giggles, whether you’re stone-cold sober or sky-high.

Jennifer Lawrence
During a 2018 visit to The Howard Stern Show, the actress delved into her overwhelming experience smoking with unidentified rappers at Ellen DeGeneres’ legendary 60th birthday party.

“My ride wasn’t ready to leave yet, so I smoked a joint with some rappers — and their s— is different,” she said. “So I entered a different universe.”

After getting high, Lawrence headed to the portable toilet, where she instigated an intense encounter with another partygoer.

The guest offered to let Lawrence go ahead of her in line, but she could tell that the woman was just being bashful.

“So I’m in the port o’ pot and I’m like, ‘She’s gotta poop. This poor women’s just gotta poop.’ So I came out and I made a beeline for her and I went up to her and I was like, ‘Look, you gotta poop,’ ” she continued. “She was kind of laughing, but was like, ‘No — I don’t know why you’re saying that, I really don’t.’ ”

“All of a sudden security is grabbing me, because what I hadn’t realized is I am grabbing this woman by the shoulders, shaking her, screaming ‘You have to poop! You have to poop!’ And the security guard is laughing so hard because he’s heard the whole exchange. He’s like, ‘You can’t grab her, but I agree, she got to poop.’ So he and I are on the ground laughing. And the woman finally started laughing.”

“Then I got McDonald’s on the way back,” Lawrence added.

Josh Hutcherson & Seth Rogen

Earlier this year, Hutcherson revealed just how devoted his famously 420-friendly Future Man producer/director really is on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.

“I had this idea that [Seth’s] whole weed thing and smoking and all this was like a bit — it’s not,” he said. “Halfway through shooting we were outside to hang for a minute and he literally, while directing, is smoking the marijuana.”

“He has this little case and he’s like, ‘Ah, man, my wife only gave me seven joints for the day,’ ” Hutcherson continued. “I was like, ‘Seven?! Whoa, man.’ ”

Shawn Mendes
The “Lost in Japan” singer told Rolling Stone about his love of spending days enjoying the drug. “I love weed,” he said. “I wouldn’t tweet that — not yet, at least — but it’s really good for me. When I’m home, I’ll smoke and then play guitar for seven hours.”

Michael Douglas & Danny DeVito
DeVito appears on the November 2018 cover of Cigar Aficionado, where old friends from his career looked back on their relationship with the actor. Douglas chose to recall their very first meeting.

“I was on the beach, looking out at the Long Island Sound and this guy walks up to me, with this long head of hair, if you can imagine,” Douglas recalled. “He says ‘You get high?’ We were both 1967 potheads, so we smoked a joint and that was the beginning of a long, long friendship.”

Maisie Williams & Sophie Turner
The Game of Thrones stars and IRL besties told the crowd at New York Comic-Con how they decompress after crazy days of shooting.

“We’re kind of like loners of Game of Thrones, just because the past few seasons Maisie and I have sleepovers every night when we’re sleeping,” Turner said. “We just used to sit there and eat and watch stupid videos and smoke weed.”

“I don’t know if my publicist will kill me for saying this,” she continued. “We’d get high and then we’d sit in the bath together and we’d rub makeup brushes on our faces. It’s fun.”

Nick Jonas
The singer’s spontaneous choice to enjoy a THC-laced lollipop had some humiliating (for him, but hilarious for us) consequences. As Jonas recalled on The Tonight Show, a friend offered him the special candy and he thought, ‘Yeah sure, why not,’ even though he usually does not partake.

“I enjoyed the night, felt great, went to bed feeling fine,” he said. “I woke up the next day — slow motion, everything’s in slow motion. I’m like, ‘Oh no, this is happening, this is real’ — because I had to be up for the Young Hollywood Awards, presenting at the Young Hollywood Awards.”

“I’m hearing these voices [in the shower]. It’s horrible, so I call down to my girlfriend who’s in the kitchen. ‘Babe, I need some bread, I need some coffee. Something!’ ” he continued. “I get in the car, I’m trying to focus, get in the right mind frame, I’m feeling better, and then out of nowhere, I get a NARB … A NARB is a no apparent reason boner. It’s just there, I don’t know what to do.”

Jonas had no choice but to stand on the red carpet with his hands in front of his crotch.

Host Jimmy Fallon confirmed the strategy by showing the audience some throwback pics from carpet, and then took it a step further with a clip of his disastrous award presentation on stage.

“I walked offstage, I looked at my manager, I was like, ‘You think anybody knew?’ He’s like, ‘Yes, They definitely did,’ ” Jonas said.

David Spade
During an appearance on Ellen DeGeneres’ talk show, the actor and comedian revealed he had a little too much fun at her insanely star-studded party — and confused the birthday girl for none other than Justin Bieber.

After discussing brushing shoulders with Kim Kardashian West and Kris Jenner, Spade launched into the hilarious sequence of events that ensued when he came across one of DeGeneres’ “rapper buddies,” whom she assumes is French Montana. “He whipped out some medical marijuana — a big rolled up doobie of it,” recalled Spade.

Spade said everything was “cool for a second” until it hit him. “… I thought you were Justin Bieber for the first half hour,” said Spade as the host cracked up. “It’s only because of your haircut! Not what you were wearing, you looked great.”

Kathy Bates
Yes, the Disjointed star lights up before reading scripts for her weed dispensary sitcom.

“When I read the scripts, I’m stoned,” Bates shared on Late Night with Seth Meyers. “I just wish I had a seatbelt in bed. I laugh so hard I’m afraid to get up… [Smoking] is research!”

A few days earlier, the actress explained to Late Show host Stephen Colbert why you should never smoke with Bill Maher. “I actually had just a quick taste one time when I sat next to Bill Maher at a party. It was Penny Marshall’s birthday,” she said. “And I just got to tell you, never share a joint with a stranger, even if they’re famous — especially Bill Maher. I don’t even remember what happened, it was just insane.”

Kirsten Dunst
The actress accidentally got higher than she had ever been before on the set of her movie, Woodshock. “You have movie pot, which is basically fake,” she explained on Jimmy Kimmel Live. “But we were doing this one scene where, obviously in the movie I don’t smoke that many, but when you’re doing takes you’re doing one after the next, after next … So, after we’re done with the scene I went back to this little bedroom to rest, and I started to feel like I was losing my mind. I went to the bathroom, I’m pacing. [I told director Laura Mulleavy], ‘There is something wrong with me, I think I need to go to the hospital. Like, there’s something seriously up. I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’m shaking, I’m hot, I’m just flipping out.’ ”

“[A producer] goes back, he looks at everything I smoked. He came back and he’s like, ‘Oh, you smoked a full blunt on one of the takes.’ And we’re talking about Humboldt weed. I don’t smoke full joints. This is like strong s—,” she continued, going on to explain that the locals who had rolled the joints threw some real ones in “for fun.”

“I was crying, laughing, eating a peanut butter sandwich — I couldn’t film anymore, they sent me home! I was a total mess. I’ve never been that stoned in my entire life.”

Miley Cyrus
While explaining her decision to take a break from smoking weed on The Tonight Show, the notoriously pro-marijuana singer revealed that the drug had influenced her interview antics.

“You, without knowing it were kind of the reason for [quitting],” she told host Jimmy Fallon. “Because I’ve always been very stoned on your shows … Remember the last time I was here, I think I was dressed as like a bunny rabbit and then like a cat? There’s a reason for that — I was high.”

“I stopped smoking because to sit here and to talk about what I’m doing I wanted to be really clear because I’m actually the most passionate about what I’m doing with this record,” Cyrus continued. “This record for me at this moment is the most important album that I’ve ever made and so I wanted to make sure I’m super clear about the way I’m talking.”

The star also admitted that her stoner days mostly involved staying home to eat and play with her pets. “I was spending way too much time with the pig, and not enough time doing really anything,” she said.

Anne Hathaway
Andy Cohen was partially successful at getting Hathaway to come clean about her rumored smoking habit while playing “Plead the Fifth” on Watch What Happens Live.

“There was a rumor in 2015 that a photo exists and was circulating of you with a massive blunt,” Cohen began his inquiry. “On a scale of one to 10, how big of a stoner is Anne Hathaway?”

“I’m not a little one,” Hathaway replied with a smirk. “But here’s the thing, here’s the thing, though. I’m a parent and I don’t feel like getting arrested, so I’m gonna say ‘zero.’ I guess I should have just pleaded the fifth on that one. But I don’t have a card or anything.”

Elle King
The “Ex’s & Oh’s” singer bit off a little more THC than she could chew before the 2017 Grammys. “Note to self, don’t eat a bunch of pot muffins before the Grammys red carpet. #AccidentallyHighAF,” she captioned a glazed-eyed photo of herself being interviewed on the red carpet.

In another post, King noted that she hadn’t realized the flower crown she wore to the ceremony made her look like “A F—— SNAPCHAT FILTER” because of the whole “accidentally high AF” thing.

King went on to share a clip from one of her on-camera interviews from the night, critiquing her own dazed performance.

“This is what happens when you’re accidentally rly stoned at the Grammys. You see something shiny, forget that you’re on camera, then forget the question, then remember no one should ever let me be interviewed. #SorryMom #StonedAtTheGrammys,” she wrote.

Andrew Garfield
Garfield recently recounted his favorite birthday memory for W magazine, revealing that he and a group of friends, including then-girlfriend Emma Stone, had an extra magical time at Disneyland in 2012.

“They came out to L.A. to surprise me. We went to Disneyland. We ate pot brownies. It was literally heaven,” he recalled. The actor went on to admit he rode Space Mountain three times, and “freaked out” on It’s a Small World: “I was like, ‘it is — it is a f—ing small world — it’s a f—ing – it’s a really f—ing small world, guys, is anyone else seeing how small it is?’ Amazing. Amazing.”

“It was wild. It was one of the best days of my life. It really was,” he added.

Susan Sarandon
Like many celebrity confessions, Sarandon’s awards show secret was first disclosed on Andy Cohen’s Watch What Happens Live. During a round of “Plead the Fifth” in 2013, Cohen asked the screen legend to “Name one Hollywood event that you should show up to stoned.”

“Only one?” she responded. “I would say almost all except the Oscars.”

Speaking to PEOPLE a few months later, Sarandon admitted that it was “an exaggeration” to say that she was high at “every awards show.” “That whole thing of going stoned to every awards show, I wish that could have been possible, but no, that was an exaggeration,” she said.

The screen legend went on to explain the practical pitfalls of toking up before an awards ceremony. “The only down side I can think of with weed is the munchies. And I don’t handle them, I munch,” she confessed. “Awards shows are four hours long. So by the time you even get through the red carpet, unfortunately, you’re not high anymore. But your blood sugar drops and they would do very well to pass out munchies. I remember one time sitting in front of Seal at a very long show and he was passing out little snacks, which was very helpful.”

Jennifer Lawrence (Again)
Following in Sarandon’s footsteps, Lawrence spilled about her pre-Oscars puffing on Watch What Happens Live. “I smoked pot at none of [the awards shows], but I saw my brother smoking out of a bong before one of the Oscars, won’t say which,” she told Cohen.

“Did you take a little hit?” the host pressed.

“Um, yeah,” she replied.

As for whether the pre-show bong moment took place the year she won Best Actress (and famously fell on her way to the podium), Lawrence kept mum and opted to “plead the fifth.”

Zayn Malik
The former One Directioner-turned-solo-star opened up about his herb habits during a November 2016 interview with ES Magazine. “Weed is also a part of my life for certain things,” he told the outlet. “I find it helps me be creative. Some people say it kills your ambition, some people say it destroys your personality. Personally I haven’t had any of them experiences yet.”

When the mag asked if he eats his breakfast with a side of pot, he coyly grinned and replied “I don’t think I’m allowed to specify — don’t get me arrested.”

Tove Lo
The “Habits (Stay High)” singer revealed to PEOPLE that her collaboration with Wiz Khalifa on the track “Influence” involved some studio smoking.

“He came to the studio, we smoked, and he recorded,” she said. Lo recalled being impressed with Khalifa’s performance ability after he partook in the potent strain. “I remember sitting there like, ‘This is really good weed, and f—, how can he sing that fast?!’ ”

Not afraid to show the receipts, Lo posted a video of her studio session with the famous cannabis connoisseur, in which they trade hits from a homemade apple pipe.

The Trainwreck Cast
Bill Hader told Seth Meyers all about the cast’s Amsterdam adventure during a 2015 Late Night appearance. “We got stoned. We all got crazy stoned,” the actor said when Meyers asked what they got up to in the Dutch city.

According to Hader, the experience turned into a bit of a misadventure when he and costar Vanessa Bayer decided to take a stroll through the red light district. “Vanessa was just holding on to me for like dear life, and just looking around — stoned, freaked out … and then we lost her. And I lost her, and it’s my fault, and then it was like I was too stoned to go find her.”

The Saturday Night Live actress then showed up on the Late Night set to chastise Hader for leaving her behind.

From Jennifer Lawrence to Shawn Mendes, these famous faces have shared their funniest 420 tales